Loving the New Job

Well last week I started the new job and I am loving it so far. Unlike most of the officers up there I haven't had much training, they have just thrown me to the dogs. I've done some fun tasks and some unpleasant ones. Today I got to take my first field trip and take someone to the hospital for testings, I got to help check in someone, and dealt with some that just didn't want to listen. It keeps you busy and makes the day go be faster also. I really am enjoying working there and can't wait for what else is to come!

One Year Older and Wiser Too

Happy Birthday to

ME!!!

Today this little girl turned 23. Man I'm growing up and too fast at times, and not fast enough at others :)

Turning Around

Lately we all know I haven't been too happy with things in my life. Well today I was finally offered the job I really wanted! Prepare yourself for this because it's not what most people see me doing, or think would be a good fit for me, however I am WAAAAYYYY excited. I'm going to be working at the Kentucky State Penitentiary in the psychiatric ward as an officer! I can't wait to start :)

Cumberland Falls

This past weekend almost 80 of us singles got together and headed down to Cumberland Falls in southern Kentucky. We had a camp out and then headed down the river. Some of us canoed while others kayaked, I was personally kayaking. Not long into the trip down the river Josh and I managed to get caught on a rock... fun right?! So the kayak wouldn't loosen so it took 3 men to pull it out and empty it out (I helped as well... or tried to). My legs got cuts and bruises on them from where the kayak was full of water and actually sinking with me still in it. While it was sinking it went under the other kayak and was turning (with me in it keep in mind). So finally I get out of it but my ankle was beat up some, but we got it all taking care of and went on down the river again. What a beautiful thing Heavenly Father gave to us, nature. As we continued down the river I really was reminded of what all we have been blessed with.

When our trip was to an end Josh and I were headed towards the side of the river when we were taken by surprise. When I mean taken, I mean it literally. Our kayak was overturned by a big wave that came from nowhere and flipped us out and sent the kayak down the river. Josh was lucky enough to end up closer to the river bank than I. The current was moving so fast and rapidly that it swept me away in the the middle of the river and farther down stream. As I finally get my footing on a rock I happened to find (underwater so it was slippery) I start praying loud and more intense than I ever have in my life.

Here I am stuck in the middle of this river and I'm using every ounce of energy and strength I have to keep from moving further down stream. However I wasn't strong enough and it continued to move me but not much. Josh is standing in the water closer to the bank looking helpless as to how to help me, and I just tell him to go to the bank. As I said I was praying loud and more intense than I ever have (I was actually screaming the pray towards the Heavens), for I was afraid for what would come if I didn't get out of the river soon.

Keep in mind of where we were kayaking. The place is called Cumberland FALLS! Behind me is the waterfall that would surely be the death of me I thought if I didn't get out soon. I couldn't stand there much longer when finally the current slowed down enough that I thought I could move sllllowllly towards the bank. It took me awhile and I finally made it, however there now was another issue, the kayak.

The Kayak was father down the river than we both were, but we are so grateful that some of my friends were able to stop it from going over, along with all our stuff! The Lord loves us and makes sure we are taken care of even in times of need.

While on the bank we have to figure away out for the bank was all rocks that lead into a forest kind of. As we start to climb some, out of nowhere my friend Lance appears to come help us. He had been standing on the bridge above and couldn't see us but only the kayak and figured someone needed help and headed towards us. He helped Josh and I up this little hill/ forest to the main road and walk back to our group.

Needless to say, I cannot thank the Lord enough for His tender mercies and love. Josh and I had a great time with our friends even though we had a little trouble. It really was a marvelous trip and sight to be reminded of what all the Lord has done and given us.

Here are some pictures I have found online of where we were, needless to say my camera is now long gone, along with the pictures. Enjoy and never forget to thank your Heavenly Father for all that He has done for us. I am thankful for the answer to my prayer in my time of despair.

Cumberland Falls

The falls again

Here is the bridge that Lance was on, and part of the river.

The River

The bank of the river along the way

One of those days

This week has been crazy and I've had to do everything to keep from screaming.

Well today it all just finally built up and I just had to yell and scream (don't worry not at anyone but the pillow at least) I'm going nuts and I feel like I just can't take anymore. I miss my friends out west and even more so my best friend. I talk to him but it's not the same as seeing him everyday and just being there. Also I got baby (the car) back on Wed, just for it to be back in the shop on Fri. How unfair is that?! Now I am car-less because baby is not getting fixed :( So what am I to do now. I am car-less, hate my job, and can't stand where I live (not the house but just KY)!

UGH it's one of those days!

Update on Baby

Yesterday I took Baby into the mechanics. They spent all day trying to figure out what was wrong and so as of this afternoon they couldn't get Baby to just shut off like she'd being doing for me (one of MANY issues they're working on). So they took her for a little drive and sure enough they had to tow her back to the shop because she died right in the middle of the road like I told them she would! As of right now I have no other news but that I am not crazy and I was right... that will teach them to not believe me again! (:

Baby Trouble Again

Baby is having troubles again and this time I'm pretty sure it's not gonna get fixed this time! Makes me really sad because she is mine and paid for. However I know I need to do something and to fix her will cost just as much as a new car more than likely :(

(p.s. Baby is my CAR for those who don't know)

Adventures

This past Friday I got off work early so Kady and I got ready for our adventure! We headed for a tee-ball game but it got rained out :( So we went bowling for her first time instead. Kady soon fell in love with the game and cannot wait to go back again soon. Not to mention she totally beat me (But she had bummers and a ball ramp).

Kady Bug and Me

And now your gone

First off I'd say like to say sometimes life doesn't make sense and I know it's not always going to, but I just wish it did! Last week I lost one of my childhood friends. This alone wasn't happy, but she left behind a 2 year old daughter and my heart goes out to her. She was a single mother and I ache to wonder what will happen with our loving little Ry! ...

I was sitting here getting things together for my Relief Society Presidency meeting today and afterward I just started thinking. Those of you who know me, that's not always a good thing lol!

Anyway I think everyone knows how it feels when life is going great and something comes up or happens that you don't know what to do about. Then from there it's as if everything else seems to fall apart as well. I'm not saying by any means that my life is falling apart, but I do feel like I'm just froze.

I'm stuck at a dead end job, I love the kids, but I honestly don't like who I work for and how things are ran. So I try to figure out what I should do with my life, and like always nothing feels right. For once I wish something amazing would just land in my lap or be thrown at me that is a great opportunity. I do my best to look for new jobs, look at schools, and careers, but nothing just feels like it's what I'm supposed to be doing. Then when I'm down on myself for all this, others come along and have to keep feeding to me that I need to do something with my life. Or tell me I'm not trying hard enough! Do you NOT see me going and trying?! Really?!?! Do you think I LIKE feeling like a failure, do you think I LIKE feeling like I can't do anything worthwhile?! REALLY?! I am tired of it all.

When these times come, I tend to miss my best friends. I miss them and just wish I could be around them. I was looking back at my old blogs today just so I could see them and long for the life I had back then. I felt like my life was headed somewhere, I felt like I was doing something that actually counted. I felt like what I was doing made others happy and proud of me. I hate the feeling I have now. I know I have a good life and I shouldn't be complaining and in my own mind I'm not, I'm just expressing my feelings. I have a family that loves me and an amazing man and little girl in my life. I have the gospel of Jesus Christ and a calling that makes me feel the love of the Savior for me and others. However my career/school life seems to just be falling apart . I just wish I knew what to do. I'm tired, wore out, and just plain sick of this. I'm ready for something, but I don't know what the Lord has in store for me and that is the frustrating part to me,

not knowing!

Flowers

Last weekend Bethany and Dominic came over to help plant flowers with grandpa, and when they got here they had a little friend to play with also. Kady and Josh were over and they had fun playing and getting to know everyone.

Bethany taking a break already

Kady and Papa

Kady and Bethany

Aren't the girls so cute working hard?!

Our little gardeners

Hanging out

Playing around in the backyard relaxing

Josh and I

Josh, Kady, and I